Entertain me, demands season ticket holder

A Southampton season ticket holder has told the club he will not renew his ticket unless guarantees are made over entertainment levels at home games next season, it has emerged.

42-year-old Steve Willis from Redbridge has been a season ticket holder since Southampton returned to the Premier League in 2012 but now admits his 5-year run could be coming to an end.

He told Go Marching In: “This season was crap. The football was so negative. I’ve done the math: this year my season ticket cost me £570 and we only scored 17 goals at home. So I basically paid £33.52 per goal. Compare that to the 2015/16 season when we scored 39, which works out at £14.60 per goal. I feel ripped off.”

“If the club can guarantee me at least 30 goals for next season I will happily renew as that’s £19 a goal. I spoke to some bloke at the ticket office and said as a gesture of goodwill I’d be willing to spend up to £23 per goal, but not a penny more. He said he’d get back to me.”

Willis hinted that he would be in favour of a pay-per-goal system, in an attempt to give fans better value for money: “At the start of the season the club should agree with the fans on a ‘price-per-goal’ in exchange for all of our bank details.

“So say the price-per-goal is £15 and we end up winning 2-0, I’d happily let the club take £30 from my account. But if we don’t score I shouldn’t be expected to have to pay to watch that shit.”